The title says it all.

You ever wonder who that sexy go go dancer you were hitting on last night went home with? More likely than not, she went home to her boyfriend, child, parents, roommate, dorm room, etc. Maybe she went and partied with her co-workers.

One thing is for sure. She didn’t go home with the creepy guy who stood there winking at her all night. Sorry, man. That only works for James Bond, Bruce Wayne and Tony Stark.

Some guys, however don’t get the point. And now you know why attractive female night life workers don’t use their real names on Facebook:

1.

“Hey, I randomly came across your profile. I swear I haven’t been stalking you for months or anything!”

Hi Dan! You came across my profile? Well in that case, let’s have sex!

2.

“My body is perfect… but I’m a f***ing tool.”

Guys, let this be a lesson to you. Even with ripped abs and flawless pecs, sometimes the best way to win a woman over is by smiling and keeping your mouth shut.

3.

“Scissor me timbers!”

Equal opportunity stalking.

4.

This is actually disturbing:

“Hi, I’m an Arab flight attendant named Osama. I followed you home from the club last night. Let’s be friends.”

5.

“Let’s make babies. You’re beautiful. Don’t wanna talk to me? Fine you’re a whore.”

Well, he opened things up on January 19 with the innocent proposition of conception. After 10 months and no response, the woman he once thought could be the mother of his children demoted to ratchet. Calling all psychiatrists.

6.

“By ‘help’ I mean sex. Get it? Cause of the quotes?”

Next time the toilet’s clogged she can give Pai a call.

7.

“Let’s f***.”

At least this guy (or girl) is concise and honest.

8.

“Are you real?”

You can probably blame the fact you wrote this message on tequila as well.

Moral of the story, gentlemen? There are plenty of girls that come to the club who are DTF or at least down to hook up on the dance floor. The go go dancers are working. Of all the women you see, are you really going after the ones dancing on a block in their underwear? How old are you bro?

You’re better off pre-gaming and going to the strip club. At least then they’ll actually talk to you. Not to mention show you some skin.

If you do happen to be a facebook stalker, ifne. But if you don’t have the balls to say hi in person. remember, you’ve got a lot of creepy competition out there.