Pot Wine Ushers New Breed of Fatter Lazier People
Marijuana & Wine
Together at Last?
Just when you think the cosmos have peaked with the ultimate in famous combinations- chocolate and peanut butter, salt and pepper, Sonny and Cher, those clever Californians come back at you with Marijuana Wine. As if the DEA and the FDA didn’t have enough problems.
Rumor has it Wine Country has been at this concoction for quite sometime, but until Gourmet broke the newest invention, only the true insiders and VIPS were in the loop.
“In wine country, pot-infused wines are the open secrets that present themselves in unmarked bottles at the end of winemaker dinners and very VIP tours.”
Imagine, if Robert Deniro went on a private tour of “such and such” winery, he would get the secret tour, into the private cellar where no doubt Betty White, Madonna, and Justin Timberlake and Brad Pitt would be sipping on the secret super VIP stash of Marijuana wine out of an unmarked bottle. All the while, the average Joe would be stuck outside on a rough wool blanket sipping out of Styrofoam and waiting for the party bus to come back and scoop him up.
This revolutionary concoction—which is called either “special wine” or “green wine” or “tree wine”—is crafted in pretty much the way you’d imagine it would be. Says one anonymous chef,
“I know a winemaker that takes a couple of barrels a year and puts a ton of weed in it and lets it steep, and that wine is just super potent.”
Just what the world needs, the Uber generation of even lazier and more heavily overweight people. But, unless you are a true VIP (which you probably are not) or a wine maker, or living in the future, the closest you will likely come is making the combo in your own mouth.
Please note marijuana is illegal in D.C. (unless you have a Rx which resulted from being diagnosed from one of the following approved conditions: HIV, AIDS, glaucoma, multiple sclerosis, cancer, other conditions that are chronic, long-lasting, debilitating, or that interfere with the basic functions of life, serious medical conditions for which the use of medical marijuana is beneficial, patients undergoing treatments such as chemotherapy and radiotherapy) and is not being endorsed.
Bulletproof Breasts
Silicone Breast Implants Saved
Lives
In honor of Breast Cancer Awareness Month
The family fight that would have ended with the woman’s death if it had not been for her silicon implants.
October is breast cancer awareness month. About 39,840 women in the U.S. were expected to die in 2010 from breast cancer, though death rates have been decreasing since 1990. Let’s take a look at some breast (implants) that actually saved women’s lives.
A 40-year-old Russian woman’s breast implant reportedly saved the woman’s life after her husband stabbed her this weekend. Her breast implants were so big that they stopped his knife from piercing any of her vital organs. Surgeons that operated on the woman said the man stabbed his wife in the heart, but the knife stuck in the woman’s silicon breast, which saved her life.
This is not the first time a bulletproof breast implant saved women’s lives. In 2010, a silicone breast implant saved the life of a California woman who was shot in the chest by a gunman.
“She’s just one lucky woman,” said Dr. Ashkan Ghavami. “The bullet fragments were millimeters from her heart and her vital organs. Had she not had the implant, she might not be alive today.
This may be a great selling point for boyfriends or surgeons trying to pump up girls worldwide. Or the new Kevlar for lady cops!
Breast cancer awareness month is an annual international health campaign organized by major breast cancer charities every October to increase awareness of the disease and to raise funds for research into its cause, prevention, diagnosis, treatment and cure. The campaign also offers information and support to those affected by breast cancer. For more information visit The National Breast Cancer Foundation site and do something to support the research and study of breast cancer.
Diamonds and Black Jesus are a Gaga’s Best Friends
Lady Gaga’s Diamond Teeth Implants
Plus the premiere of a never-before-heard remix of Gaga’s Black Jesus/Amen Fashion
First came the egg, then came the drag, and now Gaga shocks the world yet again with gem studded chompers. Just in time for Paris fashion week, Lady Gaga ordered marquise diamonds to be implanted in her teeth.
Her new diamond encrusted canines premiered in the French fashion designer Thierry Mugler’s promotional video for her fashion show last week.
The film debuted at stylist Nicola Formichetti’s spring 2012 Paris Fashion Week show for Thierry Mugler on Wednesday. The fashion-forward pop superstar appeared on a big screen at the rear of the catwalk, sporting multi-coloured pigtails and diamond-fitted buck teeth, and declared herself to be a “Mugler woman”.
She spat out, “Don’t f**k with me. Don’t f**k with Mugler. Welcome to Paris. We are Paris. Jesus is the new black.”
As images of the new Formichetti collection then flashed up on the screen, a never-before-heard remix of Gaga’s Black Jesus/Amen Fashion was played over the speakers.
The singer was not present at the show, but actress Salma Hayek was among the celebrities in the audience.
Gaga’s not the first to boast this dental accessory, Lil Wayne has diamond-encrusted teeth and he can’t eat anything solid. Looks like Gaga won’t be eating corn on the cob anytime soon.
Boys Guide to Getting Down
Survival Guide for Boys Trying to Get Girls at Nightclubs
Boys Who Like Girls
Part 1
For those of you who have not seen the 2006 film The Boys & Girls Guide to Getting Down…well, you should. It is a tongue-in-cheek look at 20-something singles clubbing and partying in L.A.; the story of a single night when groups of friends go out, drink alcohol, dance and talk, and look for someone to go home with.
Dangers, minor and major, await those who don’t plan well or behave foolishly, and the rewards, even for those who plan well, are few. But the species’ survival may depend on these rituals.
Here are a few tips to help avoid the failed pick-up at the nightclub, or at least ensure not getting beat up by a chick. Not necessarily from the movie, but in the same spirit of the movie.
DON’T
Don’t try to pick up the bartender. She’s busy. If you must pick her up, only try it either very early or very late if she gave you a sign that she would even give you the time of day.- Don’t think that by buying a girl a drink that they are going to stick around, you will be just another guy buying them a drink, and they don’t owe you anything.
- Don’t get smashed or too drunk. A girl will most likely think you are a creep if you approach them slurring your words or falling over yourself.
- If the girl rejects you don’t just stand there, keep dancing and move onto someone else quic kly.
- Don’t go for a girl with a large group of girlfriends because she may turn you down in front of them to show off or because she doesn’t want to be the only one dancing.
DO
- Beware of boyfriends. They may be lurking around the corner waiting to beat you up.
- Biggest turn off is bad breath, and most guys have it. Always bring gum, mints, and don’t smoke.
- If you start to dance with a girl and she doesn’t move to the music or move at all, she is not interested in you- move on.
- Approach with humor. However, if you choose to use the funny approach be sure that your jokes are actually funny.
- Be cautious, don’t pinch or otherwise make fast and childish grabs at her. Play it safe and follow her lead until you’re perfectly clear on what she wants.
These tips won’t guarantee a off from sleeping alone on your superman sheets and your parents house, but it’s a step in the right direction.
Me Like Coldplay, Good to Dance!
Remixes Better Than Originals?
Most recently, Swedish House Mafia’s epic remix of ‘Every Teardrop is a Waterfall’ has ignited dance floors and festivals across the world.
Is Coldplay opening up to club music, or is club music welcoming Coldplay?
Indie rock as a whole is coming under the wing of dance music. We’ve noticed an increasing number of indie bands embracing their sudden integration into electronic dance music.
Empire of the Sun | The Temper Trap | The xx | The Killers | Florence and the Machine | Bloc Party
Coldplay has taken up the top club remix residence!
- Tiesto was rocking a mashup of Colplay’s ‘Fix you’ and Alesso’s remix of ‘Pressure.’
- Mike Posner recently released a dubstep remix of ‘The Scientist.’
- DJs on every level from Gabriel & Dresden to Royksopp have reworked ‘Clocks.’
- Morgan Page did a chill-out remix of ‘White Shadows’ as well.
The takeover of dance music was inevitable. Coldplay’s mainstream appeal clearly advances house music’s growing influence on dance music in America. As soon as a DJ mixes in a familiar Coldplay classic, the crowd goes wild as lead vocalist Chris Martin’s soulful voice reaches past the bass line, into the crowd.
They’re everywhere!
The Willy Wonka of Alcohol
Say Goodbye to Hangovers
Synthetic Alcohol?
An alcohol substitute that mimics its pleasant buzz without leading to drunkenness and hangovers is being developed by scientists.
You have all been there– a hard night at the club, waking up in your own vomit, with God knows who lying beside you and the biggest hangover… Well, there could be a light at the end of the tunnel. Thanks to a team of scientists in London (Willy Wonka and several Oompa-Loompas in my mind) those days may disappear with this generation.
The synthetic alcohol, being developed by a team at Imperial College London, led by Professor David Nutt (Britain’s top drug expert) who envisions a world in which people could drink without getting drunk. The substitute is derived from chemicals related to Valium and works like alcohol on nerves in the brain that provide a feeling of well being and relaxation.
Eventually it could be used to replace the alcohol content in beer, wine and spirits and the recovered ethanol (the chemical name for alcohol) could be sold as fuel.
Odorless
Tasteless
No Addiction
Easy to Flush Out
No matter how many glasses they had, they would remain in that pleasant state of mild inebriation and at the end of an evening out, revelers could pop a sober-up pill that would let them drive home or return to work. Not quite sure what this “sober-up pill” is or how that would ever get past the FDA, but it’s a nice pipe dream…
Professor Nutt believes that the new drug, which would need licensing, could have a dramatic effect on society and improve the nation’s health. I don’t see this happening any time soon, as long as liquor companies have billions to throw at policy makers. What will Dr. Drew do without the addicts? There’s always Teen Mom!
You May Need to Flash Your ID at the Fast Food Joint
It is now possible to get a glass of Merlot with your breakfast burrito…enter the fast food/fast alcohol trend. Not yet in D.C., but fast food restaurants across the United States are bending to the new trend.
It wasn’t long ago that fast food restaurants began adding apples to kids meals instead of fries, and pushing lighter salad menu options. Seems like the industry is doing a complete 180 with offering alcohol. Forget clogging your arteries with our lard soaked (yet delicious) french fries, misshapen chicken nuggets, and perfectly square burger patties, let’s crank it up a notch and attack that liver!
In a bid to boost business, several Sonic restaurants in South Florida sell beer and wine. They offer draft beer, 25 kinds of bottled beer and 10 varieties of wine.
The move follows Burger King “Whopper Bars”open in Miami, Orlando, Las Vegas, Memphis, New York City and Kansas City that boast, “Your flame-broiled premium dining experience awaits you!”
As if Starbucks has not sucked up enough of consumer’s money, four Starbucks coffee shops in the Seattle area now sell beer and wine. Beer goes for $5 a bottle, and a glass of wine for up to $9.
In a tough economy, the move towards alcohol is a way to compete with casual dining and can help boost typically slow evening business, says, Ron Paul president at Technomic, a restaurant consulting firm. “For consumers, it’s basically about having it your way — even if it’s having a beer with your burger.”
Though alcohol is not (yet) offered at the fast food drive-in, will this spread to D.C. and beyond, and more importantly will the fast food/fast alcohol trend lead to fast DUIs? Can’t wait until MADD gets ahold of this one…
Top 5 Earbud Headphones Under $100
Best Beats for Your Buck!
With the immense popularity of iPods and other portable media devices, owning a pair of earbuds is practically a necessity in today’s technology-obsessed world. Take a walk around and you’re bound to see someone wearing a pair: lobbyists on the metro, school kids on the bus, picnickers in the park, the guy in the cubicle next to you… they’re unavoidable!
Tired of your regular Apple headphones?
While nearly anyone with an iPod has a pair of the unanimous, white Apple headphones, more and more people are indulging their inner audiophiles. If you’re in the market for a quality set of earbuds but not trying to spend a fortune, here’s a list of the top 5 earbuds under $100:
Monster Turbine
$87 on Amazon.com
From the makers of Beats by Dre, these sick Monster headphones run for significantly less than their Dre line!
Klipsch Image S4
$79 on Amazon.com
The audio quality on these earbuds is worth way more than you’ll pay!
Bose IE2
$99.95 on Amazon.com
Bose has been making high quality audio products since 1964. Why should these earbuds be any different?
Thinksound TS02
$80 on Amazon.com
With plenty of bass and natural sound, these earbuds are a great value. Plus, they come in a sleek wood design!
Jays A-Jays Four
$70 on Amazon.com
Well-balanced sound and an easy to use design.
Button It Up!
Attention all Hipsters and Indie Gadget Gurus!!!
>Introducing PLAYBUTTONS<
The iPod and Internet music downloading have been the major catalyst to plummeting album sales around the world. Yet, sometimes, there is that one album from your favorite artist that you feel bad about dumping along into the endless sea that is your iTunes library.
Playbutton pairs the concept of a great album with the classic button pin for the perfect wearable way to listen to music. The front of the button typically features artwork, keeping the album cover relevant while making it easier for bands to distribute and promote their music in a tangible way. The pin itself is an MP3 player that holds an entire full-length album, all powered by a rechargeable lithium battery.
Nick Dangerfield, Playbuttons creator, said “Even if it’s a silly idea I thought it was important to establish a more intimate connection with an album—where you can hold it in your hand and [physically] have to go somewhere to buy it.
Recharge it by disconnecting your headphones and plugging the included USB dongle into the same jack. You have the option of jumping tracks, but much like a record player, the sequence of the album is nonnegotiable as an effort to retain the musicians’ vision.
Playbutton can be affixed to your lapel, or jean jacket, or any wearable fashion. I can hear the Hipster’s secretly squealing (as to not look too excited) about this new accessory.
The first batch of Playbuttons to hit the street include Bubbles’ self-titled album, a reissue of Wind’s Poem by Mount Eerie and a special Valentine-themed compilation of love songs by Vampire Weekend, Magnetic Fields, Bjork, Matthew Dear, Florence and The Machine, among others.
With a price tag of $20-$25 (Playbutton.co) the buttons may end up being more of a novelty, but I can see them as a great way to market new artists and a funky selling point at the merchandise tables at concerts.
Chewing Is So Overrated: Meal Inspired Cocktails
Move over Apple Martini!
Say hello to Grilled Cheese, McNuggets, Ham and Cheeseburgers!
The Grilled Cheese Martini
Nauseous yet? The Grilled Cheese Martini was created by Kurt Beecher Dammeier of Beecher’s Handmade Cheese and The Cellar, where the $15 off-the-menu cocktail is sold in New York City’s Flatiron District.
- Soak six piping hot sandwiches in 10 gallons of vodka, marinated for 24 hours
- Rimmed Glass with balsamic glaze and crispy Serrano prosciutto
- All poured over a giant tomato ice cube with basil garnish
As for the taste: Apparently it’s exactly like grilled cheese – liquid grilled cheese.
The McNuggetini
Not to be left in the dark, Chicken McNuggets make their fateful leap into a booze-fueled form. Los Angeles residents, Alie Ward and Georgia Hardstark concocted this ultimate drink that combines dinner, cocktail, and dessert- The McNuggetini.
- Vanilla Vodka and McDonalds chocolate milkshake
- Shake and pour into a martini glass rimmed in BBQ sauce
- Topped off with a chicken nugget garnish
The creators’ claim it tastes a lot like a White Russian, once you get past the BBQ sauce.
The Ham Daiquiri
Following up on the McNuggetini, Hardstark and Ward revealed their latest concoction: The Ham Daiquiri!
- Pineapple & Pineapple Soda
- Honey & Honey Ham
- Jamaican Rum
- Liquid Smoke
- All blended together into what they call a “violent storm of pig meat and fruit”
To no surprise, they gag, describing it as “chewy” and “like someone came along and chewed your lunch for you”. They also advised bringing a barf bag- just in case!
The Cheeseburger
Finally, to the delight of meat-lovers everywhere, quirky mixologists dreamed up the Cheeseburger released by Flor de Caña rum.
- Beef stock reduction layered with rum
- Muddled Roma tomatoes and fresh iceberg lettuce water
- Garnished with an aged cheddar frico (a type of cheese crisp) and a kosher dill pickle garnish
Apparently Americans have an insatiable thirst for the perfect cocktail-as-meal but I draw the line at Ham Daiquiri.
