Seems like everyone’s a DJ these days. Well, at least everyone thinks a fancy a pair of blinged out headphones, and an extensive iPod playlist is all it takes, and celebrities are some of the biggest offenders of the instant DJ. Check out this laughable list of the weirdest celebrity wanna-be DJs while you wish they’d leave this skill to the professionals.

 

David Beckham

Former England footballer and LA Galaxy midfielder, and um super hot David Beckham, uploaded his “Winter 2014″ chart on Beatport and its pretty underground. He’s featured some wickedly talented and fast rising producers. It’s is an intimate collection of dark, purist tech house music gems. He showed his ‘skills’ at The End, London, for garage night Twice As Nice for a two-hour set.

Nigel Benn

Former world super middleweight champion aka the Dark Destroyer, is now a DJ? According to Benn,
“I have two loves in my life, House music and boxing. I adore them both with equal measure to such an extent, that my idea of heaven evolves around the spectacle of two fully grown men beating seven balls of shit out of each other, as I get stuck into a chicken Korma, washed down with a six pack of Stella Artois, whilst listening to some serious Deep House at full volume. Believe me, there’s nothing like it (apart from a jackpot lottery win or a night with Cindy Crawford).” WOW.

Wesley Snipes

In 2003 the Hollywood actor, tax evader slash vampire slayer won DanceStar’s ‘Best Celebrity DJ’ award in Miami. To make things even more weird Snipes was just seen partying in a club with Paris Hilton and Justin Beiber at the Cannes film festival this year. What a threesome- Hollyweird House Mafia?

Elijah Wood

Wonder if Frodo is his DJ name? Nope, it DJ E-Wood. The ‘Lord of the Rings’ star has done some gigs in Brooklyn and Austin’s SXSW festival, and just did a gig at FanstasyCon in Salt Lake City over the fourth of July holiday weekend. What a nerd fest that must have been!

Tommy Lee

Heavy metal drummer Tommy Lee, now on his farewell tour with Motley Crue, moonlights as a DJ, mostly as a duo with DJ Aero.

Deejaying is no passing fad for TOMMY LEE. As he told The Miami New Times, “This DJ project will never be over. This isn’t like a quick little, ‘I’m gonna play techno music with my buddy Aero for a minute.’ It’s tattooed in. It’s not going away.” Remember when he came to Glow in 2009 and played piano with Sharam of Deep Dish?

Hulk Hogan

Hulk Hogan tried his hand as a DJ, and even spent some time in the booth with Steve Aoki who tweeted “The Hulk in my DJ booth. @hulkhogan #hulkamania”, but passed the baton to his son, Nick Hogan.

According to the Chicago Tribune, the younger Hogan first tried his hand at DJing a few years back after his pop-star sister Brooke gave him a pair of turntables. Since then, he’s opened for DJ Pauly D and played a handful of other gigs around the country. He recently released the acid-tinged track “Everybody’s Doing It”.

Michelle Rodriguez

The bad ass Fast and Furious actress is apparently now a DJ as well. She just held it down behind the DJ booth at the L.A. Gay & Lesbian Center’s 2014 An Evening with Women event held at The Beverly Hilton in May in Beverly Hills. We’re too scared of her to say anything bad.

Snooki

Perhaps taking a cue from her ‘Jersey Shore’ co-star DJ Pauly D, who played several times at our very Barcode. Or perhaps she’s looking for a back up career after her reality television stint runs dry. The pint size wanna-be even has her own line of headphones, no doubt tacky and gawdy.

Alicia Keys

Alicia Keys has picked up a new talent while being married to producer/rapper Swizz Beatz. The songstress premiered her alter-ego Mrs. DJ AK-47 recently while at a party at New York City’s Yotel hotel. She took over the turntables from Swizzy and immediately got the party rocking as she spun a few joints by Busta Rhymes, Pete Rock and Gang Starr. Don’t quit your day job.

Justin Bieber

Just no. Can’t even go there. No DJing, no singing, no dancing, no driving, no smoking, no existing, just no no no.

Macaulay Culkin

KEVIN!!! It’s now ‘DJ Mac’, and apparently he’s a one stop party shop, promotes his own “iPod parties”, where he’s the DJ of honor, and brings the party favors. His parties generally have an off the wall theme like, Macaulay Culkin’s iPod: Dinosaur Birthday Party. Weird, though it looks like he may have taken his partying too far.

Lindsay Lohan

Another train wreck turned DJ. Maybe she was just trying to get closer to her then girlfriend and “sort-of” DJ Samantha Ronson. Whatever the case is, we can’t imagine this having been something anyone was seriously trying to see.

Dennis Rodman

Former NBA champion announced his plans to become a celebrity DJ in 2010 and hit the road with his bestie, who taught him how to DJ. He played a bunch of second-rate nightclub events and a Kentucky Derby party, landed in rehab and well nobody cares.

Kim Kardashian

Let me guess, a Kim K set would be plopping a Kanye CD in and rolling through the tracks, maybe a hair flip or two, a few makeup touch ups, and the whole club falls asleep. Stick to showing up as celebrity guest at a club, grab your check and leave the turntables to someone with better musical and marital taste.

Paris Hilton

The epitome of entitlement Paris Hilton is she is dead serious about this DJ game. She’s dated Afrojack, who’s called her out about her lack of DJ skills, but really, he didn’t even need to speak (especially since he’s still worked with her on her forthcoming album for Cash Money). Though she did win the ‘Best Celebrity DJ’ at the Dancestar Awards in 2004 and did a recent gig at our very own Echostage in DC, which we are sure was one of her greatest nights.

Kirstie Ally

Nothing about her alias as DJ Lil Buttercup, screams hardcore DJ, yet Lil Buttercup made her DJ debut at Colony, a Hollywood nightclub in 2011. Think she peaked at during her ‘Look Who’s Talking’ and ‘Cheers’ days…

Matt LeBlanc

Matt Le Blanc tried his hand as a DJ with the FashionTV crowd at Maddox nightclub on the last night of London Fashion Week 2010. The former ‘Friends’ star looks nervous outside of his classic Joey role.

Solange Knowles

Beyonce’s little sis was nominated for Golden Spin Award for Celebrity DJ Of The Year in 2012. Wonder if she beat anyone up because she didn’t win! It must suck to be the less loved sister under the shadow of Beyonce’s weave.

 

Don’t quit your day job people, is that the lesson we can all learn here? Or should we follow Tosh.0 whose wise words on DJs, start with “you know why everyone thinks they can DJ? Because they can…” Let’s just let him sum it all up for us with this video and you can make up your own minds.